Theory
The feeling of emotional or physical tension is called stress. Stress could arise
out of events and thoughts. Stress is the reaction of the body to a challenge or
demand. The stress causing factors are referred to as “stressors” or stress
triggers. Stress is good, as it enhances our capabilities to overcome the
challenges. Such a stress which can excite us, motivate us, make use of our
productive energy to gain more focus and helps us to take on the challenge
positively is referred to as the eustress. Lack of stress results in boredom.
However, when the resource at our disposal to tackle a challenge falls short of the
requirement, it gives rise to stress or distress which is really bad. When the stress
is no longer manageable, we finally reach out to burn out. However, we classify
stress into two main types. One is called as acute stress and the other referred to
as chronic stress.
Acute stress is a short term stress that goes away quickly;
however chronic stress is something that lasts for a longer period of time. Acute
stress is not harmful, but chronic stress can lead to emotional and physical health
issues. Chronic stress can lead us to health issues such as diabetics, obesity, heart
diseases, blood pressure and depression. The Holmes Rahe stress scale points
out that the major factors which contributes to depression are associated with
relationship issues such as death of near ones, divorce, separation from family
etc. Stress cannot be avoided, it can only be managed. Even though there are a
whole lot of stress management strategies available, one good methodology to
mitigate chronic stress would be like the one below.
Acute stress can happen on account of an immediate challenge in front of us. It is
natural to have these challenges and we feel that momentary stress. However, in
chronic stress, even though challenges do not come at every moment, we
continue to have the stress. This chronic stress can be tracked to the continuous
negative thoughts and worries we have on particular matters. These repetitive
thoughts trigger unhealthy emotions driving us to stress. If we are able to shut
down these thoughts, or alter our thoughts, no emotions would be triggered and
there would be no release of stress hormones. Hence, to get a good relief, burn
the thought- emotional highway leading to destination stress.
Story
Asha had always been the strong one. The dependable daughter, the reliable
colleague, and a friend everyone leaned on. She woke up early, slept late, and
rushed through each day with a smile that was beginning to feel heavier than her
body could carry. But no one knew the storm inside her.
Work deadlines, her mother’s medical bills, her brother’s college fees, and her
own fears, they all lived inside her like tightly packed stones. The world only saw
her calm face. Only her pillow saw the tears she quietly hid in the dark.
One ordinary tuesday afternoon, while presenting a report at work, Asha
suddenly felt her chest tighten, her breath grew shallow, her hands trembled and
her vision blurred. Everyone in the meeting room kept talking, but their voices felt
distant like echoes from another world.
She excused herself, walked to the restroom, and locked the door.
There, she leaned against the sink, breath shaking, tears flowing without
permission. In the mirror, she didn’t see the strong, collected Asha everyone
admired. She saw a tired girl who was carrying the weight of a thousand
expectations. She whispered to herself, “I can’t go on like this.”
That evening, as she reached home, her elderly neighbour, Mrs. Fernandes, was
watering her plants. The old lady took one look at Asha and said, “Beta… your
eyes are speaking today, come sit with me.”Something in that simple sentence
broke the last wall Asha had been holding up. They sat on the small bench in the
balcony. For the first time in many months, Asha spoke, really spoke.
She shared everything, the stress, the fear, the exhaustion, the ache of pretending
to be fine. Mrs. Fernandes listened, not with solutions, but with silence, a silence
that held her, understood her and comforted her. After Asha finished, the old lady
gently said, “Stress is not a sign of weakness, my child. It is a sign you have been
strong for too long.”She then handed Asha a small potted tulsi plant and said,
“Every morning, water this plant and yourself, sit beside it for five minutes and
just breathe. Let the world wait a little.”Asha nodded, unsure but strangely
hopeful.
The next morning, Asha woke up early, not for work, but for herself.
She sat on her balcony, placed the small plant in front of her, and closed her eyes.
For the first time in years, she did nothing, no multitasking, no worrying, and no
planning. She breathed, and the breath felt like a soft apology to her own body
for pushing too hard, for ignoring its whispers, for forgetting that she was human.
Day after day, she continued this small ritual. Five minutes of stillness, five
minutes of breathing, five minutes of returning to herself.
Slowly, her stress didn’t disappear, but it lost its power over her. She started
saying “no” without guilt. She asked her brother to share responsibilities.
She delegated tasks at work. She rested without feeling ashamed. The strong
woman returned, but this time, she was strong from within.
One evening, after many weeks, Asha met Mrs. Fernandes again. “You look
different today, beta,” the old lady smiled. Asha looked at her and replied softly,
“I feel different, I stopped drowning, I learned to float.”The old lady nodded
knowingly. “That’s the secret, my child. Life won’t stop sending waves.
But when you learn to breathe through them, stress loses its storm.”Asha smiled,
a real smile this time, because she had finally learned that coping with stress
wasn’t about avoiding life…but about learning to live gently with it.
Learning
Stress is not our enemy. We break not because life is heavy, but because we carry
it alone. The moment we pause, breathe, share, and allow ourselves to feel, we
begin to heal. Coping is not escaping.It is embracing life with clarity, compassion,
and courage, and sometimes, all it takes to reclaim ourselves is a few minutes of
stillness and one person who whisper, “You don’t have to do it all today.”
Activity
Identify three factors that keep you pressing day in and day out inducing stress.
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Quote
“The greatest weapon against stress is our ability to choose one thought over
another” ~ William James.
Takeaways
1. The feeling of emotional or physical tension is called stress. Stress could
arise out of events and thoughts. Stress is the reaction of the body to a
challenge or demand.
2. To get a good relief from stress, burn the thought-emotional highway.