Theory
Emotional triggers are words, actions, situations or memories that provoke strong
emotional reactions within us. A critical comment may trigger anger, being ignored
may trigger sadness, and making a mistake may trigger fear or anxiety.
Our reactions are often influenced by past experiences, beliefs, habits and
memories stored in the subconscious mind. The same situation may affect two
people differently because their perceptions and internal maps differ.
The key is not to eliminate emotions, but to recognize our triggers, pause before
reacting, and choose a better response.
Story
Anand was a capable employee, but whenever his manager corrected his work, he
became defensive. He felt that the manager was questioning his competence.
One day, his colleague asked him, “Are you reacting to the feedback, or to what
you believe the feedback means?”
That question made Anand reflect. He realized that past criticism had made him
sensitive to correction. From then on, whenever he received feedback, he paused,
took a breath and asked for specific suggestions.
Gradually, feedback became an opportunity to improve rather than a reason to feel
hurt.
Learning
A trigger may be beyond our control, but our response need not be automatic.
When we identify the emotion, understand the belief behind it and pause before
acting, we gain greater control over our behaviour and relationships.
Activity
Identify three emotional triggers in your life.
1. What situation or behaviour triggers me?
2. What emotion do I experience?
3. How can I respond more constructively next time?
Quote
“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to
choose our response.” — Viktor E. Frankl
Take Away
1. Recognize the situations that trigger strong emotions.
2. Pause and reflect before reacting.
3. Replace impulsive reactions with conscious responses.